burny

my first day off in live foreverrrrrrr
guess what im doing?
NOTHING!
I'm so tired still. I might just go back to bed, cause I can :)

That stupid idiot still hasn't called me... THANK GOD.

I was hit by a car and the guy who did it called me the other day to ask me if I would pay the 500 dollars it would cost to fix the dent in his car.

I basically hung up on him.

I am using every possible second up before I go to work doing non-work stuff. It's a very dangerous thing. lol.

I ammm weird and silly.
And I just ate a salad and a sandwich and it was so so so good and now I need to really get ready for work but I don't want to so I am writing a very long run on sentence instead and it's so much more fun then getting ready for work.

Tomorrow I will have my first day off since the first! It's going to be awesome. I'm not going to do anything. At all. fuck yeah.

I slept too long... so now I am tired.

I heard coyotes the other night howling at the moon. A lot of them. It wasn't scary to me at all though. It was actually peaceful for some weird reason. It made me smile and fall asleep.

My boyfriend is nice. He has been cooking and cleaning for me since I have had no time at all.
It's awesome that I don't have to drag my ass into the kitchen to try to make food when all I want to do is sleep.

that is all. that is it. thisssssssssss is the end of the postttttt

Half an hour until I have to leave for work.
I have had to call triple A three times in one week to come and tow Brandon's car that we just bought. It's going to be over 500 dollars to get it fixed. What's new... I have to spend money that I absolutely do not have.
Saw on the web today that there was another shooting. Only this time it was some blue collar guy working in an office building who'd lost his mind. It just makes me realize that people really are stretched too thin these days. People are asking lots of questions and getting no answers. I know exactly where they are all coming from. How are you supposed to make it in a world that is trying it's hardest to keep you down. This place shouldn't be called the land of opportunity anymore. It should be called the land of consumption and consequence. I just want to be able to stand on my own two feet. I feel like I have to work harder then everyone else to get there... it's almost driving me crazy. Not take a gun to work crazy ... more like turn coo coo and let someone else take care of me for the rest of my life crazy. Then I won't have to think about paying bills or feeding myself or how I'm going to be able to put enough gas in my car to get to work. Instead I'll just worry about why there are thirteen cheese balls in my bowl instead of twelve like every other Friday, or maybe why the people around me suddenly all look like giant lobsters.
That would be the life.... the nutso life.

Guess I must need it... since I'm gravitating toward it.
Today was weird. I realized that just being in certain surroundings can completely change my mood.
When I am at home I am normally in a thoughtful mood.
When I am at work I am usually really really happy or irritated. That makes me excited because I have never had a job were I've gone to work and felt really really happy for as long as I can remember.
When I am on the freeway I feel nervous or pissed or like I could sing forever.

I don't know it's just amazing to me how surroundings affect your mood ... which affects the way you come across to other people... which affects your life........ ohhhhhh how profound..... blah blah blah

Anyway spaghetti time..... or in the words of some gnarly character Tim and Eric made up:

"Spaghet!"

I have bread turkey and pasta noodles..... sooo many options so little time.

Things are finally set up. Well, kind of.

I have most things put away but I really need a desk to store all of my office stuff in.

I think I may be coming down with a cold... it's disgusting... my ears are leaking... yeah sick. (definitely my sinuses)

I'll be much more comfortable and happy when we get a stupid desk in here and this old bookshelf out of the middle of the room.

Once upon a time... I had a life and people actually read this thing.
Once upon a time... I actually had working cameras so that I could document my life and show people what was up to.
Once upon a time... I thought I would never be afraid to go back home.
Once upon a time... Ignorance was bliss
Once upon a time... I was convinced people cared about me... (once upon a time ignorance was bliss)
Once upon a time... I didn't know what it meant to be worked to the bone.
And she lived.......

This whole being a gimp thing has made this week so much harder.... not just physically.
Actually I could care less that it's harder for me to move around except for the fact that I am stuck here in the same spot... I'm tired of being alone.
Break ups are hard ... and its your friends who help you through it... trouble is... I haven't seen much of them or talked to them really.... I just see a lot of him... and it's starting to weigh on me...
I just want someone to talk to. It seems like everyone is so busy......
maybe they're not, maybe they are.
I can't expect someone to drop everything to come and hang out with me, especially since I have officially become an inconvenience.
Nothing like a debilitating injury to stop you dead in your tracks and really take the microscope to your life.

Does anyone want to play? :-\

Hello everyone.
So I have been kind of sneaking around on live journal reading people's posts and trying to absorb some of the things that other people have to say because people are interesting. I stumbled across finding_bliss I haven't read many of his posts but I listened to one of his voice posts today... and I literally teared up. If you're a girl you might want to take a listen... it's just him going on and on about how amazing this girl is that he's with that he met online. It gets cut off at the end and it's kind of long so I almost didn't listen to the whole thing... but if you're bored and you want to hear what unconventional love sounds like... or maybe true love... I haven't decided yet... go listen.
Post date: Feb 9th 11:40 pm

I feel like I'm missing out on the live journal experience....

I stopped writing because someone kept leaving me horrible comments over and over as an anonymous person. I figured if people wanted to hear what I had to say or if I needed to vent I could just talk to one of my friends in person. Anyway, the time has come... I am no longer running away from or hiding from those rude commenter's. Say whatever it is you want to say to me, I have a right to write whatever I want and so do you.
Bring it on.

...oh and
hello everyone.
:)
I'm back.

I know I said goodbye... but I thought I would just stop by to say...

PARTY AT MY HOUSE FRIDAY. :)

CELEBRATING MY GRADUATION TO LEVEL TWO IN SCHOOL! and my parent's being out of town.

Ya'll are invited... except for mr. or mrs. rude anonymous comment leaver.

<3 love ya'll

goodbye live journal.

Favorite movies:

Which movie makes you cry like a baby?

Which one makes you laugh until you're sore?

Which one makes you bored as hell?

Which one makes you have an overall wonderful feeling?

Which one makes you so scared you almost make poopies in your pants?

Which one is your absolute all time favorite?

Just thought it would be interesting to see peoples responses, and it will help me pick some movies to watch :)

Is luv and love the same thing?

unaccomplishment is my accomplishment.

I want to feel the sun on my face but the light hurts my eyes.
I think I may just stay inside, crawl under the covers and forget I'm alive.

We talk like lions
but we sacrifice like lambs

can't you see my walls are crumbling...

she says she's tired of life
she must be tired of something.

Get right to the heart of matters... it's the heart that matters more

I think you'd better turn your ticket in and get your money back at the door.

Whatever.
It's not like anything works out in my favor.

I'm so tired.
So far today I have watched
Pay it Forward.
Four Weddings and a Funeral
.. and I am now currently watching Titanic
All I have done is lay in bed and eat and sit in front of the computer and watch tbs.
Life is awesome.
Until tomorrow when I have to actually do things again and start being responsible... ew.
Oh and last night while getting wasted with my old band members we decided to become a band again so that's a plus... making music is always good.
THE END.

Today has actually been alright.
It's nice.

There's no design your flaws are fine.

...Actually I need a nap.
Finals suck.
Brother's are stupid.
Money isn't my friend.
Boys are distant.
Parent's are pushy.


... so actually... I need a drink.

Thank God for booze and friends or I might .... be...... worse?
"I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I can't keep it all together."

Is anyone else excited that they're making a ninja turtles movie???!!

80 things you prob didn't know about me.

Whats your middle name? Nichole


How big is your bed? umm queen? I think...


What are you listening to right now? Incubus


When is your birthday? November 21st


Hair color? blonde


What are the last 3 digits in your cellphone number? 544


What was the last thing you ate? taco bell... i feel sick :-\


Last person you hugged? Alex Brown and Janette <3


How is the weather right now? sunny and windy


Who was the last person you talked to on the phone? Ryan :) <3


Favorite type of Food? yummy kind


Do you want children? eventually i think


Do you drink alcohol? i sure do


Ever get so drunk you don't remember the entire night? haha. Do I even have to answer that?


Eye color? blue/gray


Do you wear contacts/glasses? nope.


Favorite holiday? Halloween... it used to be Christmas...


Favorite Season? urrr summer or fall


Have you ever cried over a girl/boy? yes :(


Last Movie you Watched? In her shoes


What books are you reading? the da vinci code...... HA


Piercings? ears


Favorite Movie? Moulin Rouge... my dvd is messed up i can't watch it :(


Favorite football Team? BALLS


What were you doing before filling this out? hanging out with Alex and Janette at dog beach


Any pets? 2 doggies and 5 turtles


Dogs or cats? BOTH!


Have you ever loved someone? yes


Who would you like to see right now? Ryan, Ryan, Ryan.


Have you ever fired a gun? yep


Do you like to travel by plane? no not really... scary :-\


Right-handed or Left-handed? right


If you could go to any place right now where would you go? India.


Are you missing someone? yes... Ryan


Do you still watch cartoons on Saturday mornings? I watch cartoons whenever i want ch81


Are you hiding something from someone? I don't think so..


ARE YOU 18? 21 biotch


WHAT IS THE WALLPAPER ON YOUR CELLPHONE? rain forest?


DID YOU GET ENOUGH SLEEP LAST NIGHT? yeah


FIRST THING YOU THOUGHT ABOUT THIS MORNING? I'm hung over... then... Ryan. :D haha


WHAT DO YOU HAVE HANDY AT YOUR BEDSIDE? Everything that I need


GRILLED Or FRIED? usually grilled


WHAT MAKES YOU UNIQUE? the fact that i'm unique


ARE YOU AFRAID OF THE DARK? .... yes.


FAVORITE HANGOUT? my room... or gaslamp.... or shannons .... or karens apartment


4 THINGS YOU CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT? Ryan, Showers, Love, Friends/Family


FAVORITE SONG?? urggg all of them?


WHAT ARE YOU AFRAID OF? death... the dark.... screwing up


WHATS YOUR FATHERS MIDDLE NAME? Lee


WHATS YOUR MOTHERS MIDDLE NAME? anne sort of.... not really because that's her first name so she doesn't really have one.


STUCK ON A DESERTED ISLAND & COULD TAKE ONE THING? .... uh.... common..... Ryan... duh.


FAVORITE T.V. COMMERCIAL? don't have one


CELL PHONE PROVIDER? sprint


FIRST THING YOU'LL SAVE IN A FIRE? my family/friends/puppies


Whats your favorite color? blues!


WHAT ARE THE THINGS YOU ALWAYS TAKE WITH YOU? my purse with everything i need in it.


WHAT DID YOU WANNA BE WHEN YOU WERE A KID? a lounge singer lol.


WHAT DO YOU USUALLY DO WHEN THE CLOCK TURNS 11:11? think about gianennio or that song by rufus wainwright


THE COLOR OF YOUR BEDSHEET? white


WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT BEFORE YOU GO TO BED? ...... RYAN. lol.

( FINALLY. He sent me a message. )


<3